Sunday, June 8, 2014

Things I Love: Small Changes

         I love small changes.  This is something I've only recently begun to grasp.  See, I'm an all-or-nothing kind of person.  I want to do it all NOW!  And for years (too many to mention), that's precisely what I tried to do.  I tried to make big, sweeping, monumental, change.  Change it all right now.  Turn-myself-into-an-entirely-different-person change.  Knuckle down and add instant discipline.
          Only, my brain doesn't work like that.  I love the planning, the goal-setting, the making stuff to go with the plan.  When it comes to executing the plan, I overdose on change, and usually by Wednesday (if I start the New Plan on Monday), I am done.  D.O.N.E.  I hate the new plan, and myself for failing.
          So, this time, I am doing small changes.  Changes that I can live with.
          Picture it like this...  Have you ever watched an artist paint a picture?  I look at it, think it's beautiful as-is, but the artist adds highlights to the water, making it sparkle; or shadows, highlights, and tiny lines to the trees, making them look real; or impossibly fine lines to a bird, giving it amazing feathers.  This is what I'm talking about -- the seemingly small changes that add so very much.

           How am I loving my family through this?  I am making those small changes, one each week or so, and focusing on that going forward.  I've read that it takes between 21 and 30 days to make a new habit.  I don't know  much truth there is in that, but it makes sense.
           I am also being intentional about which habits I choose.  For far too long, I chose poorly.  I focused on housekeeping solely.  I did not focus on the people in the house I'm keeping.  And my efforts were too large.  I wanted to change my whole routine quickly, and only where the house was concerned.  This time, I have made my first habit something for my husband, the second one has been a housekeeping habit, the third one (which I am starting today) will be focused on my children.  Yes, it means that the housework changes aren't happening as fast as they "could," BUT I have learned that I cannot make too many changes at once, and I am not a compartmentalizing person.  My whole life is integrated, and I must make my habits this way.
          We are also heading to church today, to worship, learn, and fellowship with other believers.  This is a very loving thing, also.  And frequently challenging!
            I ended up staying home with a sick kiddo.  Our oldest ("the doctor") came down with a stomach bug last night.  So I kept her home.

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